Welcome to my on-line journal of my recovery from the wounds of childhood sexual abuse. A “journey journal”… and an inspirational refuge for you during your journey.
Here is a little bit about me, Rayne…
…in my early-30’s, a God-lead therapist discussed with me the concrete evidence [she observed] that lead her to believe that I was sexually abused for the majority of my childhood. My initial reaction was one of complete astonishment [not because of pride, but ignorance… I grew up in a very conservative Christian home, with just as strong a Christian heritage from generations before, this “world” of abuse was not a part of mine]. Although I was immediately attentive to the possibility, for the next several years I remained distant from this world, because I was consciously not a part of it – nor it yet me.
Now, it is nearly six years later. I am in the healing process from living with repressed memories from [apparently] a very deceitful and painful childhood. “When Rayne Whispers” is a safe place God created for me, for [re]defining me. It is a part of my journey’s recovery and discoveries.
I have [four] God-gifted therapists working with me. God has blessed me with my husband of 13 years and four children, who all keep me smiling, especially on days when I don’t want to. I also have the support of a most precious and inspiring group of survivors – who I could never go without mentioning, their bravery and God-faith is more than words can write!!
I talk to God daily about the [current] journey of my healing. I am also devoted to pray about what my responsibilities may be as a result of my healing. And, this I know! This journey [of mine] is not a selfish undertaking – it is one to be shared with you.
I think the benefits of being inspired, encouraged and mature through the previous steps that others share with us to find victory from traumas and trials is a tremendous gift (to the giver and the receiver); a respectable and honorable gift of faith. Education, experiences, understanding, insights and encouragement help us grow in countless ways and assist us in the freedom God has for our lives.
But, sometimes I find it difficult to relate to someone who is not where I am at… which sometimes no one really knows where I am at either. But, I do know that I am being made new with the help of the Holy Spirit. It is not a smooth journey. Much of the time it is not a pretty journey. But, it is the journey God has laid for me to travel so I may find myself renewed, new, confident, complete and full of joy because of who He made [and intended ] me to be.
I feel it my genuine privilege to be transparent and honest with you. It is a privilege because it is not natural, nor easy, to communicate in this way; but, my passion and calling. I have had, and will have many more, storms that I go through on my journey. But, it is my sincere prayer that any of my [many written words] may help you to know that you are not alone. More importantly, my words inspired and directed by the Holy Spirit will renew your assurance that His strength can be found in your weakness. I don’t have a “story” to tell — yet. But, I have a journey to share.
So, here I am in this whimsical flight. I hope my progress will bring an accompanied reassurance to you…. a sense of “you” ownership and authority… and the encouragement to claim the right of transformation, from victim to victorious life you have [only through and in Christ]!
Friend, let the rain fall. Allow the storms to come. Know the thunder will too pass. Embrace times of hibernation. Let your senses and your heart feel the refreshing…. fill with freshness. Newness. Because, God WILL make you new! Even during (especially during) the storms and the rain, let God whisper. Still. Listen to the whispers. Sometimes, that is all we can hear.
~ Rayne Whispers
“About Rayne” was written on the day of my first blog posting.